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ɢᴏʟᴅᴇɴ ᴘᴇᴀᴄᴏᴄᴋ ᴍᴏᴅs ([personal profile] goldmods) wrote in [community profile] peacockstop2025-09-15 09:00 pm
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TDM 011



【 Thank you for choosing the Golden Peacock, 5-star resort and casino. You are currently registered as a WILDCARD in our system.

We are thrilled to announce that the Golden Peacock will be embracing autumn with a special outing. Current and new guests are invited to join us for a refreshing outdoor experience where participants can unplug, unwind, and connect with nature. During this time, all Watches will be disabled to the most basic functions (texting, calls, checking chip account) in order to encourage guests to disconnect.

Please look forward to two weeks of finding yourself amongst the trees. We hope you enjoy your stay, and have a fan-CAMP-stic time. 】



CAMPING
GETTING OFF THE GRID
As the resort moves into what it claims is autumn, the days grow shorter. The projected sun in the Vale sets in the afternoon, after which a faint chill falls. Then there’s the most excessive transformation of all – a portion of the Vale has transformed into a campground complete with a scenic lake, seemingly overnight. Statues nearby have been dressed up with flannel jackets and suspenders. Folksy banjo fills the air without any discernible source.

A section of the campgrounds have been reserved for tents. These tents vary in size, shape, and supplies. All tents, regardless of quality, are supplied with sex toys and lube. Staff and long-standing guests all agree — pretending to live in the wilderness and 'rough it' for a while is thrilling. This is what the peasants feel like all the time!
NOT ALL TENTS ARE EQUALHigh-rank guests are allocated spacious and luxurious tents. These elaborate mini-homes come with TVs, beds, heaters, and plenty of supplies. Provided camping gear is high quality, ranging from state of the art flashlights to designer backpacks. It can't quite be considered roughing it in these tents, but glamping is camping too!

Mid-rank guests are allocated moderate tents that comfortably fit up to three guests. These tents come with cots or sleeping bags, as well as standard camping gear to make their time living off the land fairly comfortable. While these tents lack the bells and whistles of the high-rank accommodations, they are more than enough for a comfortable but realistic camping experience.

Low-rank guests are allocated the shabbiest tents. These sagging accommodations can shield one guest comfortably, but that doesn't stop staff from pairing low-ranking guests together in order to save space. Their 'sleeping bags' are a single blanket and hay bale pillow. There are no other included amenities aside from sex toys and a single lantern.

► Last but certainly not least: our Wildcards! All Wildcards have been randomly assigned. Whether they end up in a glamping tent or sleeping beneath a propped up sheet is left to chance. Wildcards also may find themselves waking up beside a current guest or another new arrival.

► Guests that "go camping" will discover that the door connecting the Vale to the rest of the resort has mysteriously vanished. Uh oh! Looks like there's no going back to the comfortable life anytime soon. Don't worry, the door will return when it's time to pack up and head home.
LET'S GET CRAFTY ► New characters still wake up naked save for a robe, as is standard for the Golden Peacock. This round’s robes are flannel gingham to embrace camping and autumn aesthetic. Some of these robes are much shorter than others; watch out that the lake breeze doesn’t reveal more than you wanted.

► Unlike the standard, there are no racks of clothes waiting for new arrivals outside of their tents. You're roughing it out in the woods, remember? Instead of clothing, Wildcards will find an assortment of raw materials to make clothes.

Fabric rolls, hemp, buckets of leaves, leather, and other assorted goods are waiting to be cobbled into something new. The staff have been kind enough to leave some small hunting knives and wooden needles to make crafting a bit easier. Of course, they won't stop anyone that wants to embrace the wild side and strut around naked.
HOME ON THE RANGE
Welcome to the Peacock Campgrounds! Nicknamed the Stomping Grounds by long-standing guests. Rustic and right off a sparkling lake, guests will find everything they need to live in the wilderness. Staff have expertly set up fire pits, benches, hammocks, and a wooden shed to act as a tool depository. There's even an outhouse, which is a real novelty to many of the long-standing guests. Do they just... squat over that hole and do their business? How wild!

Unlike previous resort-sponsored excursions, guests are expected to manage without the help of staff. That pile of wood won't be replenished once used; guests will have to go chop down trees and split their own. Food won't magically appear in their tents regardless of rank. Camping is all about living off the land. Though staff make themselves scarce to make the experience feel real, they lurk in the shadows, discreetly providing necessary tools and fixing broken equipment so guests won't struggle too much. It isn't fun if it's real hardship, after all!
DOES ANYONE KNOW HOW TO COOK?On the first camp morning, guests will find barrels of ingredients and cooking utensils left beside the central fire pit. These barrels are stocked with fruits and vegetables that won't spoil quickly, many of which are seasonal to autumn. They have also been left a few protein options like eggs, jerky, and canned ham. These ingredients are communal and limited. Once they run out, guests will have to hunt and gather in the Vale to collect more.

Guests must prepare their own meals while camping. Not even the high-ranks are given any special treatment on this! While oil and firestarter are included in the initial supply, these too are limited and won't be replenished after use.

► Staff would never let their precious guests go without a sweet treat. A generous supply of hot cocoa and all the fixings for s'mores has been left behind as well. While none of the other food will be replenished, the hot cocoa and s'mores goodies seemingly never run out. A night around a campfire without roasting marshmallows or sipping cocoa would be too cruel to subject guests to.
SUPPLIES RUNNING LOW ► Guests will have to hunt and gather once ingredients dwindle if they want to eat. The wooden shed is home to a selection of tools that can be used to hunt: bows and arrows, hatchets, axes, fishing poles and line, etc. All tools are rudimentary and can break if not taken care of.

► The Vale is lush with wild fruits and vegetables. However, much like in reality, not all vegetation in the Vale is safe to eat. While some berries and mushrooms are consumable, others are toxic or psychedelics. One must also not forget that they're in the Golden Peacock: some unusual plants that grow in the vale may trigger arousal. Watch out that you don't eat something funky by accident!

► Before 'leaving', staff will explain that guests can fish or hunt small game running throughout the Vale. One particularly enthusiastic staff member will suggest guests track down the snoggleboffs, as they're extremely delicious after roasting on an open fire.


ACTIVITIES
TWO WEEKS OF ROUGHING IT
Camping can't be all about survival. Where's the fun in that? Before 'leaving', the staff arrange activities and events for guests to enjoy. A wooden bulletin board outlines times for group hikes, camping experiences, and wilderness delights. Adirondack chairs line the edge of the lake and a few tire swings hang over the water, tied to strong tree branches. For the first week and a half the weather is pleasant and sunny. Perfect for camping.

At night, acoustic guitars and other wooden instruments come out so that guests can make music around the bonfire. Projected stars dapple the night sky, forming various constellations sourced from guest worlds. The moon enters a different phase each night, shining a gentle silver across the campgrounds. Why not pull your sweetheart in and cuddle beneath the night sky? It's so romantic.
IN CAMP ► Guests that don't want a cold shower should make their way over to the shower stalls quickly. These outdoor showers hold very little hot water and run cold after about five minutes. First-come first-serve!

► A wood-chopping competition begins around lunchtime. There are two goals: to split as much wood as possible and looking sexy while doing it. Guests that chop wood unsexily immediately fail! Alternatively, sexiness with a pathetic number of chunks is more acceptable, but still a loss. Those that achieve both goals will instantly win a large payout. Failing to sexily cut wood won’t have any penalties associated with it, and you can always try again tomorrow!

Bear hunting is a popular activity that even the spoiled long-standing guests are getting in on! No, not hunting real bears. That would be insane. Peacock's version of bear hunting involves hunting down bear-like guests and capturing them! Any guest that fits the criteria of big, thick, and strong may potentially be assigned the role of bear. Hunters who manage to tie up, handcuff, net, or otherwise 'capture' a 'bear' will instantly receive a large payout.
THE LAKE ► This sparkling lake is rich with fish. Enjoy sitting back on the long pier with a fishing rod or take one of the wooden boats out for a row around the lake. It's also safe to swim in, for guests that would like to take a dip and rinse off the sweat of camp living! Don't mind the random swim trunks or drink umbrellas that pop up now and then. This water is definitely fresh and not recycled from the summer beach extravaganza.

► Guests that do decide to take a dip may encounter a familiar friend. Fernando the tentacle monster is camping too! This randy tentacle monster is as horny as ever, eager to embrace guests and stick slippery tentacles into any reachable orifice.

► Once the sun goes down, many of the long-standing guests strip off their shoddily crafted clothes and sprint into the water for skinny dipping by moonlight! What's a camping excursion without a lake-side orgy? The best way to drown out those erotic moans from the lake is to head to the central fire pit and join in on some campfire songs.
OUTSIDE CAMP ► Those that head out of camp for a hike or hunt can enjoy any of the Vale's usual wonders. With autumn, shiny apples dangle from the trees and pumpkins pepper beneath their protruding roots. Along with autumnal fruits and vegetables, canned beef and ham have been mysteriously left in pockets close to the campgrounds. A little act of kindness from the staff; not everyone is cut out to hunt their own game!

► For those interested in hunting down some fresh game, walking around the forest in the morning may come with a stroke of luck. Strange little creatures the size of an adult's fist are active during this time. These hairy beasts come in brown and white, and screech, "Scrun scrun screeee!" when agitated.

Yes, these are the alleged snoggleboffs! Don't feel bad about hunting them, they're an invasive species that are unfriendly and eager to steal from unsuspecting guests. Their main strength is their speed, but once caught, they don't put up much of a fight.

► Guests that explore deep into the Vale may find a dark cave mouth that leads downward into a damp chamber. The ceiling glitters with stalactites and, along the wall, they'll find a horizontal crease with what seems to be... hair? If touched, this crease will creak open, revealing a large eye that darts back and forth before focusing on whoever woke it. Black pupils and iris bleed into one endless abyss.

Those that gaze directly into the eye will freeze. Their mind will remain active while their body locks in place, not unlike sleep paralysis. This trance will break once the eye blinks, which it will do after some time... but it can also be forced into blinking by force if there's someone who hasn't made eye-contact around to help. Frozen guests will be overwhelmed with the fear of abandonment for the duration of their paralysis. This fear will fade after the connection is broken, as if it wasn't their fear at all.

Like a regular eye, dirt or debris can force a blink. If this route is taken, the eye will go bloodshot and shut, refusing to open again. Any guest that inflicts damage to the eye may find that their suite, upon return, has been trashed. As if someone or something threw a big tantrum in there while they were gone. Wonder why that happened...?


HOWLING
CALL OF THE WILD
Temperatures drop drastically at night as the camping excursion nears its end. Nights become so chilly that morning dew frosts over, crunching beneath guest feet. Every day the light and its warmth set a little bit earlier. Staff remain elusive and do not provide warmer blankets or clothes for guests, leaving them to cuddle for warmth or find other ways to sleep comfortably during nightly cold snaps.

The moon hits its apex on the final night of camping. Unlike the other nights, this full moon shines blood red. The Vale stills under this ominous sign, silent. Snowflakes begins to fall, spreading an endless clean sheet across the campgrounds. That reflected pink hue is inescapable.
THE WEATHER TURNSAlong with chilly nights, the last few days of camping feature inclement weather conditions. Clouds overtake the sun and rain falls, alternating between light mist and heavy downpour.

Winds pick up, with speeds threatening to whip away the less stable tents. Guests that don't hunker down and add additional support to their tents may end up chasing them into the storm. Other loose items around the campgrounds may end up blown away as well.
BLOOD MOON ► Wild instinct rises with the blood moon. As crimson moonlight beckons, some guests may begin to feel ... strange. As if they need to claw their true selves free. Those that answer the call to bathe in the light of the blood moon will undergo a transformation.

► Basking in the light of the blood moon triggers a were-transformation. While the standard were that the blood moon inspires is the classic werewolf, guests may transform into any kind of were. Along with hybrid transformation, the blood moon stirs mating and sex impulses in these new weres. Remaining humans are at risk of being eaten... in the sexy way.

Transformation into a were is not mandatory. Other guests may step into the blood moon's light and not experience any kind of transformation or impulse. These guests are now actors in a sexy horror scene, given the task of surviving the night surrounded by monsters! At least they're sexy monsters? Giving in and fucking on the wild side may be more fun.
PACKING UP ► After the crazy weather and horny werewolves, the staff judge that it's high time to wrap this excursion up. Guests will once again openly see these diligent workers the morning after the blood moon. They come flooding into the site with clothing, snacks, and other comforts while praising everyone for surviving for so long without the resort's usual luxuries.

► A first aid tent and cleaning station are swiftly erected. All guests that volunteer to treat injuries sustained over the course of the camping experience or help clean up the site will be compensated with a large payout.

Every guest that participated in the camping event, regardless of whether they help wrap things up, will be issued a spa voucher. Go relax, you've earned some pampering after all of that hard living!


OOC NOTES

INVITES | RESERVES | APPLICATIONS
BLANKET CW: altered states; eyes (descriptions only, incl. eye injury); exhibitionism; hunting (incl. hunting fantasy creatures); orgies; public sex; survival; temperature play; tentacles; transformation; violence

▶ All characters on the TDM are WILDCARDS, which means they have not yet been assigned a card value. Suits will not manifest until characters are accepted into the game.

▶ All TDMs are game canon. This TDM acts as the game's September event. Camping will ICly begin September 15th and end October 3rd.

▶ Current characters may top level on the TDM. Any current characters posting to the TDM should note they are current in their subject header.

▶ The top level directory is for new characters only. We want to make sure new characters are prioritized and receive attention! If you would be interested in a game invitation, you can note that in your comment header.

▶ Smut threads that take place on this TDM can be used for rewards. If both parties in the smut thread join the game, you may retroactively apply the character's initial card values to your 52 bank. If one character does not join the game the thread will not be applicable toward rewards (as that character would not have a card value). The character that does join would still receive a small payout for the encounter. Hopefully it was a fun thread regardless!

▶ We ask you to kindly add content warnings to your threads as appropriate.

▶ If you do not currently have permissions and kinks listed in your character’s journal we suggest leaving a note in your top level of any limits or boundaries for other players to reference.
NAVIGATIONLOGNETWORKOOCMEME
precipitous: (81)

furina de fontaine / genshin impact / returning character/player

[personal profile] precipitous 2025-09-16 07:05 am (UTC)(link)
a. off the grid
[ Now, someone so esteemed as one Furina de Fontaine can't say that she has been one for camping nearly ever, and those brief times where she's had to hit the road and suitable accommodations couldn't be made at an inn, any bouts of "camping" were definitely on the end of the spectrum of the high-ranking tents. She's still rather naive in many ways, so she's expecting much of the same from this outing — so consider her shocked when she is assigned to a tent that is little more than a lean-to propped up against a particularly wide tree trunk with not one, but two sets of bedding. She has a cloth robe, a blanket, and a straw pillow to her name, and naught else. The, ahem, eccentricities of the resort are coming back to her.

Well! She can't let herself get discouraged so soon — or, at the very least, she can't let that discouragement bleed through to the bravado she wears like a fine coat. With a clap of her hands, she starts to attempt to prop up one corner of the tent that has collapsed, trying to tie it to a tree branch, but completing tasks that require height are not her strong suit because, you know.

She also doesn't have her little salon to accompany her without her Vision, but she is nevertheless still talking to herself as though they're listening. ]


Aha! If I use this root for leverage, and...a well-timed jump...

[ Don't let her parkour in a robe, it won't end well. Or maybe you're her tentmate, here to witness her problem-solving(?), or after the fact, when she's failed to tie up the tent and is instead leaning against the tree trunk with her knees drawn up to her chest. This is fine... ]

b. home on the range
[ While she's made notable strides to learn to cook more than macaroni noodles, Furina still has a ways to go in the kitchen, and so she won't be attempting cooking around the campfire. It does make her feel a bit...frustrated with herself, for her difficulty contributing in a significant manner. She can't hunt, and she only recognizes a few berries and plants that are safe to eat to gather and bring back to camp. Her greatest culinary strength is, as always, with sweets, and so she'll make do with what's available to her.

Which is to say, there is now a prodigious amount of smores lined up neatly on a log near the campfire, each one looking gooey and roasted to perfection. These delicacies are new to Furina, but she took to them like an oceanid in water, learning the art of the smore after a few demos and practice. And so... ]


Voilà! I've truly outdone myself this time, it simply must be said! [ Motioning to her...smore army. ] Please, help yourself! I couldn't possibly eat all these on my own.

[ She's really beaming, overflowing with self-satisfaction. Never mind that smores are one of the easiest things to make! You wouldn't disappoint her, would you? ]

c. call of the wild
[ When the call of the blood moon reaches out for her, Furina is drawn to the water. Even in her life after rebirth, Furina still holds the sea in her heart, always a part of her, and before she even realizes it, her feet are carrying her away to the edge of the lake. The blood moon reflects like ink on the ripples as Furina steps into the tide, heedless of the water's chill, like she needs it to breathe. Wading in until she's waist-deep, the blood moon transforms her into something like a glistening, luminous mermaid. A were-oceanid, with sweeping gills that trail from her arms and an elegant finned tail. Poised in the water, she's the vision of an ethereal siren, and while this transformation would ordinarily leave her with some complex feelings, those will have to wait. For now...

She craves company she isn't able to easily seek, bound to the water as she is. She'll simply need to draw others to her, something which she has made a practiced, refined art out of, so she parts her lips and begins to sing, a haunting, yet alluring sort of melancholy melody that carries throughout the campground.

Will you join her at the water's edge? For anyone who follows the sound of her singing and draws near, she'll continue to sing even when they're close enough to touch, reaching up to wind her slender fingers around their wrist. As her song finishes, she offers a demure little smile, some of her usual nerves resurfacing, but she is too close to getting what she wants to indulge them any further. ]


Come, join me. The water is exquisite tonight, isn't it?

[ And the moon, too. It'd be a shame to let either go to waste. ]

d. wildcard
[ Not feeling any of the above prompts? Feel free to wildcard me instead! Furina was previously in-game but it's been awhile so her memory will be hazy. Open to all 18+ and her kinklist is here. Also as an ooc note, I'll be traveling Sept 18-29 so tags will be slow during that time! ]
armwriostle: Credit to <user name="brokiloen"> (pic#17092229)

a.

[personal profile] armwriostle 2025-09-16 09:58 am (UTC)(link)
[Just as Furina jumps, she'll feel an arm circle around her waist and being pulled against a firm chest.]

And what do you think you're doing?

[He saw a disaster coming a mile away, so he decides that it would be best to avoid such things. It's really for Furina's sake. He thinks that her ego would simply come crashing down if she were to fail so spectacularly. Though, now she's basically like a cat being carried in the arm of their owner.] You could just ask someone who can actually reach it than to try and attempt whatever you were thinking. I don't think it would have ended well. [Either she has the worst wardrobe malfunction or she eats dirt. Or both.]
Edited 2025-09-16 10:03 (UTC)
precipitous: (04)

[personal profile] precipitous 2025-09-17 06:43 am (UTC)(link)
[ She can't help it — unaware that anyone is in route to save her from herself, as soon as Wriothesley winds his arm around her waist and pulls her in, she lets out a sudden: ]

Eep!

[ Oh.

Two things clash in her mind at once: that was a terribly undignified sound, and it's Wriothesley who's holding onto her. Perhaps it's still rather embarrassing to be caught like this, but at least it's by someone she knows. If that weren't the case, she may have nearly combusted on the spot, which would have been quite the feat for a former Archon of Hydro. ]


Ah! Y-you see, I was simply...trying to get with the spirit of "roughing it"! [ The way she says it, the quotations are definitely audible. ] All the same...your assist is much appreciated, Wriothesley.

[ Even if her face is as colorful as a bulle fruit. ]
armwriostle: (pic#17858924)

[personal profile] armwriostle 2025-09-19 05:40 am (UTC)(link)
[He might tease her about the sound later down the line. He's more worried about the former Archon, who is technically not former yet from his point of time, but he is aware that she is no longer the Archon. The timey wimey bullshit just reminds him how long he has been here at this point.

That's something for him to mull over in private though.

He carefully places her back down now that she isn't in danger of showing off her lower regions to everyone within the vicinity. His mouth quirks into a little smile at the way she speaks. The idea of Furina roughing it... Comical.
] Just because we have to make do with what we're given doesn't mean you have to do it alone. Do you even know how to put a tent up?

[Even as he says that, he handles the area that she was trying to do by...jumping. He obviously knows a thing or two about getting these things set up. He then reaches out to press a cool palm to her cheek.] Is your face red from exertion or is it something else? [Okay, he go be doing a bit of teasing.]
menhulu: (70)

home on the range;

[personal profile] menhulu 2025-09-16 02:32 pm (UTC)(link)
[ dan heng isn't really one for desserts, most especially ones that smell so cloyingly sweet, but she's just.. so exuberant.. how can he say no?? he's a cool and aloof nameless, not a cruel jackass.

so he sits, and plucks up one of the plates of smores. ]


I've never tried anything like this before.

[ chocolate, marshmallow, and a spiced cracker? what an interesting combination, but not necessarily off-putting, even if it's likely far too sweet for his tastes. he's definitely stalling for time. ]

You made all of these yourself?
precipitous: (50)

[personal profile] precipitous 2025-09-17 06:48 am (UTC)(link)
[ If he's stalling for time, Furina doesn't seem to notice it. Rather, she seems peached as pie that someone has taken an interest in her...culinary art. Ever since she started cooking for herself, she's believed that a good meal need not be complex to make, despite what much of the cuisine in Fontaine would suggest. These little morsels of delight are just another testament to the fact!

Planting her hands on her hips, she offers a self-assured nod. ]


That's correct! All assembled, they make for quite a rustic, picturesque display! Out here in the wild, we hardly have a need for tiered dishes or ornate pedestals to display our desserts on. But go on! You simple must try it — don't hold back on your honest opinion for my sake!

[ She can take the criticism!! Her girlfail era is (somewhat) behind her! ]
menhulu: (52)

[personal profile] menhulu 2025-09-17 02:28 pm (UTC)(link)
[ it will never truly be entirely behind her, but we love that for her..

dan heng drops his gaze down to the smores again, trying not to look as dubious as he feels. at least they look well made - from what he can tell, at least, he doesn't know shit about smores. he finally lifts up one of the smores, warm chocolate falling in thick droplets onto the plate. it does smell very good. ]


All right, I'll give it a try.

[ monch..

.. oh, it's so very sweet, as expected. the warm chocolate is quite delicious, but when compared with the sugary marshmallow and the sweet cracker, it's definitely a little too rich for his blood. he can think of a few people that would love it, however. ]


It's good, but.. very very sweet. Have you tried one yourself?
laevateinns: (》2)

a!

[personal profile] laevateinns 2025-09-17 01:16 pm (UTC)(link)
[ akechi, unfortunately, finds her when she's failed.

he blinks, glances around himself surreptitiously as if hoping someone else will walk by, then sighs. ]


What's wrong? [ he asks, none too gently. ]
stripsearch: (pic#12851818)

a

[personal profile] stripsearch 2025-09-18 07:47 am (UTC)(link)
[Rise's own shabby-ass tent is right across the way, and she hasn't had much more luck than Furina's having. But she's sitting down to try and catch a breather and stop getting frustrated (like that's working).

Still, watching someone else suffer as much as she had makes her feel slightly better. At least she's not the only clueless one around here.

But that's just going to lead to problems. So now Rise speaks up.]
...you're gonna flash everyone around here?

If that's what you're trying to do, don't let me stop you, though.
malpwactice: (💊 a night of terror)

c.

[personal profile] malpwactice 2025-09-20 03:20 am (UTC)(link)
[Who the hell would follow a mysterious singing voice on the night of a bright red moon that was turning people into monsters? It's stupid! It's like asking to be chowed down on or, worse, dominated. Yep, the only safe path was to stay firmly in his tent and wait for everything to blow over.]

[He knows that but something about the song is tugging him along like a puppet on a string. He could ignore it, sure, but he feels like it would itch against his mind and drive him crazy. Instead, he reasons to himself, he was smart enough to avoid the crisis. He'd found herbs he could powder to deal with anything that had a strong sense of smell. He had a few of his usual mixes for anything else. He sneaks through the trees, trying to keep his tail as close to his body as possible. He's used to sneaking in an urban environment, all these trees were really harshing his vibe.]

[It's slow moving until he reaches the lake. There's a glowing figure atop the water and while his rational mind says danger, danger, get the fuck back to the tent, his subconscious mind urges him forward. His subconscious mind says this is familiar but he can't imagine why that's the case.]

[An old, wobbly memory comes to mind as he ends up taking steps down the dock. It was something about a girl he kissed way before he was used to kissing. He can't remember the details.]

[His eyes flicker to the dark water before flicking back to the siren that called him.]


Ah, [the sound of his own voice doesn't break the spell, he still feels a compulsion of closeness, but he's able to meet his compulsion with his own logic,]

Depends, you got a towel for me? Look at all this fur, dude, [ah] dudette, if I get wet I'm gonna start freezin'! You don't want an aaksicle, do you?