[Can you fit a dazed, confused, and somewhat disapproving centaur into a trailer with three other Wildcards? One of life’s burning questions. The answer might surprise you.

Trust that he will have to issue a string of apologies once he’s able to blink the glitter and lights out of his eyes, a slight grimace on his face as he attempts to unfold his hind legs from underneath the length of his large barrel — only to nearly hoof a poor, unsuspecting “roommate” in the ribs. Oops. Freezing one of his legs immediately, voice a deep, apologetic baritone:]

Ah… I hope I did not injure you…

[— Forget clothes for a moment. Once he takes better stock of the limited space, another burning question: how in Zeus’ name is he supposed to get out of the trailer?]

[Wonder of wonders: centaurs are just as rare in this strange pocket of reality as in his homeland.

— And it appears that every bodyguard, director, and extra knows this, too, as whole crowds trip over themselves the moment they see the large figure attempting to gingerly explore the hotel’s offerings, no fear in their eyes as they approach. Can Chiron dance? Sing? Act? Ever dreamed of the big screen? Oh, so he doesn’t know what any of that nonsense is, huh… Well, even better!

Gods, please, sign on the dotted line. They’re gonna make him and his giant cock a star.]

… If you’ll excuse me.

[Turning swiftly away, his twitching tail the only hint that he’d much rather not, actually, and while Chiron would never dare call his actions a retreat, there’s also no shame in how he takes for The Nest’s doors to shake off his pursuers. The surprising expanse of warehouse he finds makes it easier to breathe, if nothing else, albeit reminding him of his own bare chest and how he still hasn’t found so much as a large sheet to cover his human half.

Will he be taking anything? Absolutely the fuck not. Pluck not the forbidden fruit, especially when it’s lined with gaudy faux-fur.

But during his musings, his slow, thoughtful trots down the corridor of clothes, he will at least offer a pleasant nod to anyone he comes by.]

I do not suppose they’ve a separate section for more normal attire?

[Listen. Y’all can fuck around with the bodices and such, but he just wants a chiton.]

[Chiron… is not entirely sure how he ended up in the movie theatre.

No, scratch that. He knows the truth. Even having long since discovered the basic nature of the Golden Peacock (and more than happy to swear celibacy until he has more concrete answers), there are some things even a sage like him never got to experience in his lifetime. The notion of moving pictures for entertainment?

Why yes, he supposes he wouldn’t mind one look at it.

Given his size, it’s a bit of a jolt when at the front doors, he’s escorted to a seating area meant to specifically accommodate him - more an open floor concept, in execution, but it remains lovingly lined with velvet, so plush that his hooves sink down a couple of inches and make his nose twitch. After another ten minutes of firmly declining any attendant that’s hoping to make his first movie truly memorable with whatever they stuffed into the gift bags—

He’ll settle down, front legs carefully folded under his barrel, while his hind legs laze to the side, tail draped over the fetlocks. Eyes absolutely glued to the screen in open curiosity up until the moment his peace is interrupted because the attendant did not listen and figured it was alright to escort another guest to join him.]

Are you also here to see the movie? [He says, just as the group of bandits on the big screen drag up an unsuspecting siren from the turbulent waters, her shrieks of dismay turning to gasps of pleasure that Chiron steadily ignores. Smiling, even. This has absolutely nothing on Greece. A little porn isn’t going to ruin his good time, either.]

It really is a fascinating concept. I shouldn’t be surprised humans came up with something so unique.

[If none of these prompts work, hit me up with a wildcard! I love me some spontaneous shenanigans. Also bless anyone’s soul who wants to fuck this centaur; all prompts have the option for nsfw but admittedly, a character is really gonna have to shoot their shot. DM if you wanna try to work something out, though, or we can see where the horny winds take us. 18+ for any smut!]